H.G. Wells’ novel The War of the Worlds has undergone some strange mutations since it was first published in 1898. There have been modern dress adaptations on both the big screen (War of the Worlds (1952), War of the Worlds (2005)) and the small (War of the Worlds (1988-1990), the American The War of the Worlds (2019)); period set but no more faithful small screen outings (the British The War of the Worlds (2019)); there are amateur versions (War of the Worlds (1952)), at least one animated spin-off (War of the Worlds: Goliath (2012)), a concept rock album by Jeff Wayne, a mockumentary (The Great Martian War 1913-1917 (2013)), a Marvel comics spin-off and a panic-inducing radio adaptation by Orson Welles. There was even a torturous, three hour epic, directed by Timothy Hines for his company Pendragon Pictures over a number of years, that clocked in at three hours and for all its many shortcomings at least tried to stick to the letter of the original.
That last incarnation went through a few mutations of its own. As noted, the original clocked in at a bum-numbing 180 minutes so two subsequent cuts were created, The Classic War of the Worlds (125 minutes) and H.G. Wells’ The War of the Worlds: Director’s Cut (135 minutes). Though the budget is said to have been a whopping $25 million, the film – in any cut – often resembles an ambitious home movie.
Presumably in an effort to recoup some of that budget, Hines prepared a fourth version of the film in 2012, somewhat grandly titled War of the Worlds: The True Story. This version reframes the novel (“the 1898 seminal alien invasion memoir by H.G. Wells” the credits would have us believe) as a true story recounted by one Bertie Wells (Floyd Reichman), the “last survivor” of the war who was supposedly interviewed in 1965 (the footage looks remarkably modern…) and the film lost for 41 years until it was rediscovered in 2006. Bertie recounts his experiences through dialogue lifted straight from the page and a not always convincing mish-mash of archive footage, material borrowed from Bronenosets Potemkin/Battleship Potemkin (1925) and The General (1926) and lots of scenes from Hines’ other version(s) of the story.
The cheapness of Pendragon’s adaptation shines through in every scene, from the variable special effects to the distractingly fake moustache perched on the upper lip of Anthony Piana who plays the young Bertie. Lovers of American actors adopting unconvincing British accents will have a field day here and the unintentional laughs they provide may smooth you through some of the film’s other failings. It all has the feel of a not terribly good History Channel documentary, complete with whizzy graphics, mismatched archive footage and a portentous narration (by Jim Cissell) to paper over the cracks.
Reichman does what he can but is defeated by the fact that he’s being asked to recite as natural dialogue prose that was never written to be read out this way. The rest of the cast, those who appeared in the parent adaptation, are mostly awful, and it’s no surprise that most were never seen or heard from again outside of other Pendragon films. “Semi-professional” might be the politest way to describe not only the performances but the whole production.
There’s no denying Hines’ dedication to the project and his love for the Wells novel is unquestionable. And bravo for at least trying what so few people have even considered, staying true to the word as well as the spirit of the original. But goodwill only goes so far and the cumulative effect of the badly edited footage, (the “newer” footage never convinces that it was shot at the time, and one suspects that Hines hasn’t actually seen that many films that were actually shot in 1898) and lousy performances makes even this incarnation of his pet project – the shortest at 96 minutes – more of an ordeal than it needs to be. It’s not, in itself, a terrible idea but unfortunately for Hines, The Great Martian War 1913-1917 did it rather better just a year later.
In a moment of extraordinary chutzpah, Pendragon released a press release for War of the Worlds: The True Story proudly boasting that it was a “qualifier of the 85th Academy Awards.” Setting aside for a moment the grammatical gymnastics that statement jumps through, it’s utterly meaningless – every film that gets a US theatrical release in the relevant release window “qualifies” for the Academy Awards. It doesn’t follow that said film will come even close to a nomination let alone a win. You have to hand it to Hines. His film may not be all that great but his attempts at bigging it up are world class…
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